I think the point where we divide is over Andrew. And it's what Gabs noted above. Andrew is an unreliable narrator. Spike trusting Andrew for any stated motivations, let alone vague implications is unwise. So yes, that's something I find faulty reasoning for. It was a bad decision. And Season 8 has shown it was the wrong decision. .
Because as the situation stands, Buffy does not know. Spike thinks she does. The only reason he thinks this is because of Andrew. Trusting Andrew has been shown to be unwise many, many times. So Spike made a bad decision largely based on the fact that he was worried about it being awkward (as you and Eowyn note) and that he in the past is "terrified" of the intimacy he felt with Buffy (End of Days).
I'd feel differently if it were Willow telling Spike that Buffy had moved on or Dawn as the writers had originally intended but couldn't get Michelle because she was unavailable. Then I'd of course be saying, yes he tried but she already knew and Dawn told him she'd moved on and was happy. And Spike trusts Dawn and wants Buffy to be happy, so he let it go. What's more, if it had been Dawn in the scene, then the retcon wouldn't have been so easy to swallow.
Basically, Spike got played two times by Andrew--in Damage and in TGIQ. Fool Spike once (in Damage), shame on Andrew. Fool Spike twice (in TGIQ), shame on Spike.
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Because as the situation stands, Buffy does not know. Spike thinks she does. The only reason he thinks this is because of Andrew. Trusting Andrew has been shown to be unwise many, many times. So Spike made a bad decision largely based on the fact that he was worried about it being awkward (as you and Eowyn note) and that he in the past is "terrified" of the intimacy he felt with Buffy (End of Days).
I'd feel differently if it were Willow telling Spike that Buffy had moved on or Dawn as the writers had originally intended but couldn't get Michelle because she was unavailable. Then I'd of course be saying, yes he tried but she already knew and Dawn told him she'd moved on and was happy. And Spike trusts Dawn and wants Buffy to be happy, so he let it go. What's more, if it had been Dawn in the scene, then the retcon wouldn't have been so easy to swallow.
Basically, Spike got played two times by Andrew--in Damage and in TGIQ. Fool Spike once (in Damage), shame on Andrew. Fool Spike twice (in TGIQ), shame on Spike.